Sunday, October 10, 2010

Iron stomach. Wherefore art thou?

Every summer marks the the Famous Nathan's hot dog eating contest. This year, Joey Chestnut managed to ingest 54 hot dogs (and buns) in 10 minutes despite a heatwave. Each year, I find myself repulsed and curious all at the same time. How do they do it? Training! It's a bizarre form of athleticism, but eating tremendous quantities of bad food is apparently hard work.

The infamous Weiner Circle: home of the vegetable garden hot dog

I personally encountered this challenge during one of my stops on my whirlwind September travel blitz. I was in Chicago for the weekend with my wife. Chicago is where we started dating and ultimately married back in the early 90's. This was the time of grunge, Pulp Fiction and many other visceral pleasures. For me, it was the time of big, bad food. Dogs, stuffed pizza, giant cheese burgers, cheese fries, Chinese food, giant breakfasts, huge Mexican, and many other glutenous delights. Despite having my late 20's metabolism (read: higher than my middle age metabolism), this was the time that I really packed on the weight.





Muskies: little joint close to my old apt. Remember: late-night, post-beer cheese fries are never a good idea...


I have a lot of fond memories of that time of unbridled eating (though subconsciously, I think I was starting to get a little sad about the emerging Buddha belly). I rarely eat that kind of stuff any more, so it was with a certain bravery that I gave myself permission to completely blow the doors out on my return to the scene of the crime, Chicago. I gave myself one day to binge like Sid Vicious in a heroin factory. No counting. No POINTS. No good choices. [One confession: I did put in a big workout before I got started.]

First stop: The Twisted Spoke. Located at the corner of Ogden & Grand, we stumbled upon this somewhat indescribable joint when it first opened in the 90's, about a year before we moved to DC. So how would I describe the Twisted Spoke? Kind of biker bar colliding with a burger joint with a serious dose of attitude. We were particular fans of the brunch, which showcased their truly bizarre and inspired Bloody Mary. It is called the Road Rash Mary. It's basically a heavily spiced Bloody served with a spear of deli meat and peppers. Served with a beer back. I had two. Though this could have been a meal by itself, I also treated myself to the Mex Scramble (3 eggs, chorizo, cheese, home fries, toast). And I ate it all. I did this while they were showing Japanese game shows on their TV's. Surreal but fun.


Road Rash Mary: horseradish, meat, peppers with a dash of tomato juice. And a small beer.

So how did this workout for me? Badly. I spent the next 8 hours feeling like I had swallowed an acetylene torch (hotter than a propane torch, in case you were wondering). The entire upper half of my body felt like it was coated in stomach acid. Frankly, I was fairly miserable. I tried to work it off by spending the next 3-4 hours walking through all of our old neighborhood haunts and apartments. It helped a little.

About 9 hours later, I thought I would be ready for more self-abuse. We tried to get into Gino's East (stuffed pizza joint) at 9 PM, but discovered it would take an hour for our pie to be ready. Even I'm not dumb enough to eat a stuffed pizza at 10 PM. Instead, we went for a sweet Wagyu burger served with a heaping of fries. I was only able to eat half the burger and half the fries. Frankly, I felt even worse.

I returned to my hotel defeated by bad food. Back in the day, I could have polished it all without a twinge of bad feeling. I would have owned that bad food. Today, I just don't have the chops for that kind of stuff.

In retrospect, I'm really glad that I indulged this experiment. It's nice to know that I am physically incapable to eating the way that I used to. It's nice to now that this much bad food makes me feel physically ill. It's a bit like a smoker trying a cigarette after 10 years after having quit. They seem to invariably be repulsed by the experience. That's kind of how I felt about my delinquent Chicago day. For me to go back to the bad food place would require diligence and training. Maybe I should apply those efforts to some more noble cause.

Cheers,

David

22 comments:

  1. Just reading your post mady my stomach hurt. Can't imagine how you felt. lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love that you gave yourself permission to try this food again! I'm sure it will cut down on the cravings and resentment later.

    I've had this issue with getting sick from my former favorite foods as well and I feel that it helps keep me in check, so some bad foods that used to be triggers to a binge, no longer have that effect.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unfortunately for me, in many ways, this hasn't really been the case. I've been on program for almost 10 years and have lost over 170 pounds but I can STILL eat food that is really bad for me (or too much of it) without getting sick. I really only start feeling bad if I do it for several days in a row. I don't get full faster or anything like that, either, so I still have to be very conscious of my portion sizes. I've just never been able to master that "stop eating when satisfied" skill. If it's in front of me, I will eat it.

    I've managed to succeed in spite of all that, mostly, but it's been rough.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow! You are brave to try a whole day of eating whatever you wanted to eat! I think after getting sick from the first meal, I would have had enough. Recently on my birthday, I had lasagna, couldn't eat it all, brought almost half home and I couldn't believe I didn't enjoy it as much! I asked my leader why? He said your taste buds change. I just love reading your blog, thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't get full very easily. I can eat a great deal even though I have maintained my goal weight at WW's for 2 months now. Just knowing I have control makes me confident. And that's thanks to our great WW's team on Sunday here in Springfield, IL, where our leader Lois won an award at a convention she went to last week. Our meetings stay on the proper topics, but at the same time you can get your feelings out too. We are like a family now. I love WW's.

    ReplyDelete
  6. We go to Chicago 2 or 3 times a year and I HAVE to have the Gino's East deep dish with the sausage pattie. I feel like a superstar if I can eat one piece, however, "back in the day" I would 2 or 3 pieces and feel miserable.

    Thanks for sharing your day of living like Sid Vicious!

    ReplyDelete
  7. That drink looks like a recipe for heartburn! It's nice to know that even the CEO of Weight Watchers has an "off" day now and then.

    ReplyDelete
  8. David, thank you for sharing. I often think about doing a "free day", but then I worry what I will feel like after and how long it will take me to get it back off ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Good for you! I always know I'm doing well when I can't finish off an indulgence, or eating one makes me feel ill. I figure even if I'm not quite at my goal weight, the fact that my body is sensitized to heavy, greasy food must mean that I'm healthier than I sometimes am.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Loved this! Thank you for sharing! Sometimes, I drive past the old places we used to go to eat here in St. Louis, and I have this longing for all-you-can-drink-rootbeer-floats or for a sandwich at my favorite grinder place... When I read this, it made me realize that I don't really want that stuff anymore. It raised my cholesterol, it made me sick to my stomach, it helped me gain weight (making physical activity hard), and it made me feel stuffed after dinner. I want to be healthy now and find new healthy places to eat for my future.

    Thanks for sharing this. It really helped me.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I live in the UK, I swear that the Road Kill Mary or whatever it's called would be banned under the Public Health Act. You are either very brave or very foolish....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Ahh, the Weiners Circle...love their Chocolate Shake.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Wow the Road kill looks deadly. I have been at goal for 6 months now and tried to eat a danish pastry that I found in my freezer and could barely manage half of it because I'm so unused to sugar now. Although sadly I can still eat chips til they come out of my ears if I let myself.
    Good on you it's nice to know other people slip.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am rather new to Weight Watchers, and worry about how I will react next time I visit my alma mater, in a town full of unhealthy food where I was thin as a rail and ate whatever I wanted and never put on an ounce. Since then (having graduated in 1987) I seem to eat my way through Oxford Ohio on return visits. Skippers cheese fries, Brunos pizza, UDF peanut butter 'n chip ice cream, Tuffy's toasted rolls . . . and in recent years was usually about five pounds heavier after each visit. So, on my next trip, I wonder if I should allow myself to indulge a little or if I should just avoid those places? Time will tell. My next trip likely will not be until I've reached my goal weight.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thanks for sharing - we're all human and it helps to have that repeated now and then by those we look up to!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yikes! my stomach ached just thinking about digesting all these delectible delights! Thanks for sharing...I think!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. I've found the same thing. I splurged on pizza and cake for my daughters birthday and it took me two days to feel better. Won't be doing that again anytime soon. LOL I love the taste of fresh lower calorie food now. The thought of going home and pigging out on White Castles, Chicago style hot dogs and Lou Malnattis pizza almost makes me ill.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Your adventure caused my stomach to bloat and ache!! My husband and I just went to the fair, we shared an apple crisp and vanilla ice cream which is something that I should not eat (cream) but it was my husband that first said "my stomach aches and feels bloated, how are you feeling?" I had to laugh, his iron clad stomach must be getting used to skim milk and yogert ice cream..I agree with most of the posts, after awhile of eating right, the wrong stuff just doesn't appeal even if you give yourself permission...thanks for being so normal for us!!

    ReplyDelete
  19. That is crazy. But I've realized that the monster never goes away, but just learn how to deal with it better! It is sad (and not) that our favorites are no longer favorites. It's an emotional thing we need to realize our attachment with food! You just learned one more thing about your past and your present reality. YOU and my great leader are both human and I always tell her that it makes her an even better one!!! Eat healthier and happier!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. I'm from Chicago! I hear what you mean! Can't eat all that stuff anymore!

    Although have you ever been to Chicago Pizza & Oven Grinders on Clark? OMG the best ever! It's not traditional pizza. It's like a pizza pot pie! It's heaven on Earth!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Have gone on several trips to my hometown (Buffalo, NY) and visited the old favorites - At Ted's had a regular hot dog and not a foot long and split the fries.

    At John and Marys had a 6 inch super royal and a diet -- nothing else. In the old days would have been a foot long and an ice cream and maybe fries too.

    Did not get to the Anchor Bar or Duff but did get a Santora's Pizza but made a mistake - got the boneless wings not realizing they are fried instead of baked. Got a veggie pizza - should have gotten pepperoni.

    This is a once or twice a year type of trip - I exercised every day, sometimes twice a day. Next time I will get meat on the pizza.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Dude, I'm right there with ya. It is amazing to me that all the rumors are true: middle age stomachs just aren't the same. It was so disheartening when I discovered this myself on a trip to LA and a midnight Tommy's run...chili burger at midnight at 40 just doesn't work :(

    ReplyDelete